Monday, 9 April 2012

Gypsy Boy Fringe

Okay, so I know you've all been absolutely dying to know why the fuck this blog's called 'Gypsy Boy Fringe'... Well you're in luck; I'm about to tell you...
I wear my fringe with pride, but it's not without its difficulties. We've been through a lot together, and it deserves acknowledgement. Just like a slimy little caterpillar transforming into a beautiful butterfly, Fringey goes through crucial stages too.

Stage 1:
This stage was fundamentally initially a mistake, but in actual fact, it turned out to be the most fun my forehead's ever had. When the hairdresser first did it I genuinely thought she'd tried to cut my fringe OFF, but in retrospect I can now see that actually, what she was doing was creating a thing of great joy. About 90% of people don't agree with this particular life choice of mine, but what I say to them is: 'suck a dick. You wouldn't recognise a laff if it smacked you around the head.' So cute, so fun, and makes the rest of my hair look organised, even when it's really a nest. We'll call this little gem The Mini Fringe.

Stage 2:
The Original Fringe. What I first got when I decided to take the plunge and revert back to the hair I had when I was 7. Kinda short-ish, with only one real specification given to the hairdresser: 'keep my eyebrows in view.' Eyebrows are my favourites, can't go hiding them!

Stage 3:

The Sideswept Fringe. This one comes out to play when my hair is either not behaving, greasy, or just getting on my nerves. Helpful as a backup plan.

Stage 4:
The Curtains. Favoured by boy bands of the 90s, and by me, when nothing else is really working out. Mostly an accident, but sometimes actually quite fun.

Stage 5:
(Shown here in black and white for dramatic effect.)
And the pièce de résistance, the one you've all been waiting for... Gypsy Boy Fringe. This is the fringe in its most natural and primitive state, and also the hardest one to keep at bay. It rears its ugly head at the most inopportune moments, and once it's here it's pretty much impossible to convince it to piss off again. This one acquired its name from my belief that at its peak it resembles a style of hair favoured by Gypsy boys- a look that I assume is achieved with gel and great care to separate the strands in this extremely attractive way. Also known as 'Piecey Gone to Greasy' and 'Bane of my Existence.'

Stage 6:
The Grown Out Fringe. Not my fave, but an inevitable part of the fringe's life.

Stage 7:
The Pretending-you-don't-have-a-fringe Fringe. Also known as 'Being in Denial.'

So there you have it. Gypsy Boy Fringe now makes sense, as does life, and order has been restored not only in this blog, but in the world at large.

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